If You Only Knew

There are times when I just want to be alone. When I just want to tuck myself under my blanket and read a book for hours or until I fall asleep. These are the times when I don’t want to talk to anyone, even to myself. I just want to lie down and let my thoughts drift away into fantasy land even just for a few hours.

Everyone here (in WP, or almost everyone if not all) would surely understand this. You all have moments like this. And whether you have some self-issues to solve or just that super introversion takes over, you just want to be alone.

These are the times when I don’t talk a lot, even to friends and they would most likely find me staring at nothingness. And these are the times when I get unsolicited advices directly or indirectly.

I don’t mind getting advices from anyone but sometimes they aren’t really helping. They give advices as if if they know better.

I recently switched on my lone-time-mode and I immediately saw a facebook status pertaining to me and my mood. I know for sure, it was for me.

The last line of the status said, relax my friend.

I grinned. I wanted to tell that person, if you only knew how I feel. How I am trying to figure out how to do this impossible task  given to me. How I am trying to figure out what’s going on with my body and why is this happening. How I’m trying to figure out what to do when sometimes I feel like I’m about to die – ok, this part is a bit exaggerated, but who knows. I wanted to tell all of these, but I couldn’t.

I honestly haven’t figured out what to do. But I thought, how easy this could be, if I only knew what to do. This could be as easy as posting an unsolicited advice on facebook.

I wanted to tell that person, if you only knew, I wonder if you could still say, relax my friend. I wanted to tell this, but I couldn’t. And I wouldn’t.