When All The Sparks Are Gone

Spark is a term I usually hear nowadays from youngsters, a word pertaining to love or attraction, if I may be correct.

Those who are looking for love (or anything similar) will usually look for the ‘sparks’ as they say.

But is this what you really need to look for when searching for a partner?

Maybe, when you’re just looking for a temporary affair, then yes. But for long term relationships, maybe not. Though I’m not saying that the person is not right for you when you get the ‘sparks’ but you should not let the ‘sparks’ lead you.

I’m saying this because when a relationship is new, it sparkles, just like a newly opened bottle of Champagne. So, first date, first walk in the park, first concert together, first touch, and first kiss and so on, these will bring you fireworks and fireflies  every night. But what happens after sometime? What happens to a bottle of Champagne when left open for some time? It becomes flat.

Lately, I’ve been really having a difficult time dealing with some colleagues and the entire system that revolves around their department. I came to a point that I don’t want to see any email from them nor hear anything from them. I don’t wanna see any of them to the point that I felt like running at the sight of anyone even at 5meters distance. Strange, but this is how I am once things start getting into my nerves.

A few nights ago, I received an email from one of my colleagues, blaming me just because it was me. They didn’t even check, they were wrong actually, but they just had to blame me.

I broke down that night – regardless of whether I was wrong or right. I just felt bad, so bad that I didn’t have any appetite and I missed dinner (for the first time in a long while). I broke down and cried for several hours (and went to work the next day with my eyes like stung by hundreds of bees). Honestly, they weren’t worth my tears but I just couldn’t help it.

I called my husband because I felt that, I really have no one to speak to here in the island. My friends even made fun of the situation and some of them tried to argue. I felt so wronged and misunderstood. So I called him and just cried over the phone. I didn’t say much, I didn’t feel the need to.

These are the times when I appreciate my husband so much. He is there to listen to me when no one else would. He is there not to tell how wrong I am when everyone else points their fingers to me. He is there when all I want is for someone to hear my point, whether I am right or wrong and wait until I figure things out on my own.

During the early stage of our relationship, everything sparkled. I’m not saying we lost neither the sparkle nor the love. We just went on to a different level, I suppose.

I’ve read somewhere, that, to be able to keep your relationship healthy and strong, you need to keep the fire burning. If this pertains to romance, then I oppose.

I’m not sure how to explain this, but I guess, it’s not only romance. Behind a successful relationship is friendship built over time, a type of love that is way beyond just romance.

So to those who are still on the hunt, choose someone who will not just ignite some sparks at the beginning and will leave you burned out. Choose someone for keeping. Choose someone who can be with you in the dark, after the sparkle of all the fireworks is gone.

19 responses to “When All The Sparks Are Gone”

  1. Very well said. After a while, love calms down, deepens, matures.

    I hope your work situation gets better. What a bummer to bein such a situation.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you po. Hay bummer po talaga


  2. angmamangenhinyero Avatar

    “I’m not sure how to explain this, but I guess, it’s not only romance. Behind a successful relationship is friendship built over time, a type of love that is way beyond just romance.” I attest to this. Couldn’t have agreed more…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hehehe alam na alam mo yan brad

      Liked by 1 person

      1. angmamangenhinyero Avatar

        sure do brad. I don’t know but I feel compelled to thank you for trusting the man who’s your friend and husband at the same time.

        anyway keep rocking brad, both of you… \ml/!!

        Liked by 1 person

  3. All sparks are gone and what remains is a different thing, invisible to the naked eyes, brighter than sparks, sweeter than first kiss, warmer than first hug, not a feeling nor emotion, beyond romance… it’s love. I’m happy for you that you’ve found the right one for you. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hihihi salamat..
      At tama ka…beyond romance…brighter than sparks 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  4. FIrst, hugs for you Aysa!!!! Second.. aywa..words of wisdom. 🙂

    “Choose someone who can be with you in the dark, after the sparkle of all the fireworks is gone.”

    Liked by 1 person

    1. hihihihihihi pag tumatanda may words of wisdom na ha ha

      Liked by 1 person

      1. whuaaaaaaaaaaaah!!! hahaha

        Liked by 1 person

  5. I agree. I very much agree 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

      1. hahaaa. and why are you still up?? dapat tulog ka na eh.

        Liked by 1 person

  6. I fully agree! and I wish you peace in your new job and hope they will appreciate you.

    Liked by 1 person

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